To Curl My Wrists

I don't want to say anything anymore

i want to curl my wrists in an acute angle

I want to arch my back inwards, or until I swallow my tongue

I want to go under ten thousands continents

under, under

under

I don't want to get hurt anymore

nobody is hitting me, I know

but nobody ever told a story of a forgetful body

the horrifying thing of it all is my mind forgets

but my body remembers

and the confusion in between,

the scattered memories that tear into the flesh center of my blood

makes it run cold

because I know there is something I don't

want to know I don't want to know I don't want to know

what I long to know

a protection so foolproof that it is born through and ends in self sabotage

I'm sorry, I'm sorry

I know you've heard this one before